Regrettably, you’ve just realized that you’re getting a divorce. It’s finally sinking in. You have a choice.
You can speed through the classical steps or you can become a victim of them.
1. Most people start out in denial.
You have probably already been there. You didn’t want to believe it was over.
2. The next step most people experience is shock.
They’re shocked that they could ever be in this situation. Some people panic.
Others fly into a rage. Some people go emotionally numb and don’t feel anything.
During this stage, it doesn’t ever feel like you’ll come out of it alive.
3. The next phase is a roller-coaster ride.
You can’t seem to settle your feelings and thoughts. You swing from being hopeful to being utterly destroyed by your ex.
During this stage, you’ll try to intellectualize what happened.
You’ll try to understand what happened.
4. Next comes bargaining.
You are still holding onto some kind of hope that things will work out for the best.
You start being open to the idea of changing yourself to accommodate your ex.
5. Once you’re done bargaining, there’s the “letting go” phase.
This is when it really hits you.
You realize the marriage is over and there’s nothing you can do about it. So, you let it happen. Finally, there’s acceptance.
Your obsessive thoughts have stopped and you no longer want to go back to the person you were married to. It really is over.
But, even at this stage, there may be some lingering ideas that could push you back into one of the previous steps.
Here’s how to stay clean and move on with your life with these healthy habits.
Avoid Smoking, Drinking,
and Stick With Healthy Habits
It is common for the recently divorced to want to “get out there” and fill the gap that’s missing.
You may feel tempted to take up new habits, like smoking or drinking.
While it might seem like the perfect distraction, it’s not healthy and it’s only going to mess up your liver and your lungs.
If you’ve already been down that road, you might be interested in an alternative to the AA approach to kicking the drinking habit.
Websites, like non12step-drugrehabs.org, specialize in giving advice that’s cognitive-oriented as opposed to the classical AA approach.
Working out is a great way to keep your mind off of what’s happening and improve upon yourself. There’s an old saying: “the best revenge is living well.”
Now, maybe you don’t want to exact revenge on your ex, but you do want to live well.
And, you’ll eventually have to meet someone else if you want to be in another relationship.
So, logically, now is the best time to turn over a new leaf.
Learn how to do some barbell strength training and get in some more walking or jogging.
Get Lots Of Sleep
A divorce can drain you both mentally and physically.
Getting at least 8 to 10 hours of sleep every night is the best way to battle the stress of losing your spouse.
Practice Good Hygiene
Many people give up on hygiene when they learn that their spouse no longer wants to be with them.
It’s easy to fall into this trap, but don’t let it happen to you.
Your health is of critical importance during a time like this. So, keep up on your appearances, keep brushing your teeth and, whatever you do, keep showering.
What other healthy habits would you suggest to stick to after a divorce?
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We hope to see you again. Check back later for more articles on relationships, online dating and more. There is so much more to come!
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